As I wrote in a previous blog post, Tiny Seeds, “[One] thing a seed has to have in order to grow is soil. The type of soil varies based on the seed’s specific needs. Many seeds thrive in dark soil, such as potting soil. Some can live in rocky soil; others, such as baby’s breath, need a sandy soil. Some plants can survive in just water, such as an avocado tree in the beginning. No matter what type, every seed needs some sort of environment to live in, and in order to bloom, it needs to be an environment well suited for that specific seed.”

Soil is to a plant what community is to a person.  But, what is the importance of a community?

The Source of Life

I knew the soil was important, but I didn’t realize just how important until I researched. Renee Cho at the Columbia Climate School said, “Soil is the source of all life.” It provides nutrients for plants, helps to anchor their roots, and acts as a buffer against pollutants in the air and ground. The Soil Science Society of America adds that soil helps clean the air and water and provides food for animals. 

Now that we’ve gotten the science-y part out of the way, let’s get to the practical application. How exactly are soil and community related?

Practical Application

Community is defined as “a group of people living in the same place or having a particular characteristic in common” and “a feeling of fellowship with others, as a result of sharing common attitudes, interests, and goals.” I have been a part of many different communities in my 30 years. Some examples are various friend groups throughout the years, my nursing school classmates, a sorority in college, my World Race squad, and my church small group. As I go through different seasons, my community will change. While some people may stay in my life, others may leave. 

Who you allow in your life matters. It can affect you both positively and negatively. Choosing good soil, or a good community, to surround yourself with is vital. 

What is the Importance of a Community?

Growing up as an insecure introvert, I didn’t make friends easily and didn’t truly recognize the importance of a community in my life. I had friends, but I wasn’t an overly social person. Honestly, I enjoyed reading a book by myself as much as hanging out with my friends (sometimes more, depending on the day). I had a hard time finding a really solid community because I was afraid to open up, and I often felt like I didn’t truly fit in anywhere I was. 

I struggled with this the most after I graduated college. At that point, most of my friends moved to different places, and I was tasked with finding new people to do life with. But, after college, it gets much harder to meet people. Friends aren’t necessarily placed in your lap anymore like they were through roommates and classmates. During this season, I spent a lot of time alone. I got to the point where I didn’t think I needed anyone else, not more than surface-level relationships anyway.

Enter my World Race squad. 

At first, I held most of my teammates at arm’s length, because I recognize the importance of a community. I didn’t want to be too vulnerable because I didn’t want to be judged or told I wasn’t enough. One of my teammates mentioned it in our first month of the trip, and I wasn’t sure how to handle it. I wanted to lean in, needed to lean in…but I couldn’t. To find out what happened, read Personal Value #6: Vulnerability, a blog post I wrote during the third month of the Race. 

Spoiler alert: I realized I needed community in my life; even more, I wanted it! 

The Search is Worth It

Since returning from the Race in 2018, I have pursued deep and authentic relationships with others. I have sought out a community because I knew it was necessary for me to keep growing. It was important to find people who would encourage me and help me in difficult times; searching for people who would love me enough to call me out when I wasn’t making great choices was also essential. In other words, I needed to plant myself in good soil that would feed me, anchor me, and act as a buffer at times.

Right now, I can say that I have found that type of community. My husband and 3 best friends love me, fight for me, and, when needed, provide me with helpful criticism. I also am part of a small group that spurs me on both in my faith and in everyday life. I have surrounded myself with soil that allows me to grow and flourish. If that changes, I may have to plant myself in a different environment. The search for the best soil may be challenging, but it is worth it!

Take time to consider: What does your community look like? Is it providing you with what you need and helping you to grow? Or is it slowly killing you by stealing your joy?